I hope I don’t make you too wildly jealous with today’s post. What can I say, we all need a little inspiration, right? Here are some ways I am winning at parenting this week.
My six-year-old dressed himself for church today.
He wore an adorable red and aqua striped polo shirt paired with blue, green and white plaid shorts, gray Spiderman socks that came up to his knees and hideous, multicolored light up tennis shoes that I paid way too much money for.
While I couldn’t quite bring myself to take a picture, I did let him go out in public dressed light a deranged clown on drugs.
That must count for something.
[Back story: In our house we like to call a spade a spade when it comes to body parts. We use anatomically correct terms. On occasion, in a joking manner, we will call a certain body part by its derivative “peenie” ]
Imagine my surprise earlier this week when, as my kids were watching a Pokemon movie across the room (I know, I know. I had to be across the room to prevent the Projectile Vomit Response) I heard the following comments:
Look at the peenie! It’s so small.
and then a few minutes later,
“Look how big the peenie is now! It’s so big and powerful”.
Yeah, that got my attention.
I looked at the TV and could see nothing worrisome.
Thank goodness after a few well-thought out questions (I am the queen of keeping a straight face) my children described the cute, pink Pokemon which goes by the name of Happiny. I know, spelled out it doesn’t look bad at all.
It looks innocent! Joyous! Happy!
By my kids (and presumably the characters in the show) pronounce the name: huh-peenie. Try having a child yell, “Look at Happiny! It’s so small” across the room and then tell me what you think.*
*attempt at your own risk preferably not out in public or in front of grandma.
And just in case you are jealous of my (clearly) pending Mom of the Year award you might also want to know that a certain six year old had half a can of olives and a sucker* for breakfast before church yesterday.
What can I say? The olives are full of healthy fats (his dietician would love it!) and the sucker? Well, it came from a sibling.
No need to worry, halfway through the service when he was complaining that he was hungry, I took him to the kitchen and fed him three Slim Jims and half a packet of peanuts (high fat!) that were left in my bag from a recent birth. And then my parents took him out to lunch where he reportedly consumed three pieces of pizza…so I think it all evened out in the end.
So tell me, how are you winning at parenting this week?