Sometimes I don’t even know where to begin.
You know how frustrated I was with the 18 month wait for his first visit to Autism Center, the following visits, cancelled visits and visits where we just talked while he played on an iPad (provided by the Autism Center). Well, he does not qualify as falling on the autism spectrum…no surprise there. We never thought he did, but decided to go through the diagnosis process for two reasons:
1. An autism diagnosis would qualify him for resources and services.
2. We figured the more doctors and experts that examined him the better.
So where are we nearly two years after the referral? Right now, pretty much where we started, but a few good things have come of this incredibly frustrating experience. While going through the evaluation process, he had some very extensive testing done. The testing has helped Chuck and I in our understanding of some of his behaviors and helped to change our expectations of him. It has also given
ammunition information to give to the school. It is kind of hard for teachers to deny his disabilities when they are written in black and white on paper by experts at a renowned children’s hospital.
So that’s good.
In addition, he is now on a waiting list (no surprise there) for 10-13 visits for ongoing work at the biobehavioral program (yes, that’s going to be a lot of driving and missed school). That’s the great news.
The infuriating part about this? Adoption Support* won’t pay for these visits. Despite they fact that Washington State Adoption Support agreed to pay for all of his health and mental health costs until he turns 18, they won’t pay for this. In fact, he only qualifies for these services through our private insurance. The state’s idea of caring for his mental health needs is to send him to the free and low-cost mental health organizations in our county. Yes, the state is willing to pay for free services for him. Isn’t that nice of them?
You might also remember his health insurance refused to cover a walking cast for his broken ankle because we didn’t get it pre-approved.
Somehow these details weren’t mentioned in our extensive adoption training through the state.
Right now, we have made huge accommodations in our home for our son. Some seem ridiculous, but all are helping us have a more peaceful family life.
Tomorrow we have our second IEP meeting for our son in a month. The doctors and SLP at Children’s were adamant he get more help at school. They want him to have more accommodations and an aid. I have the feeling this is going to be an uphill battle. Many days I feel way too tired to fight this battle.
* Feel free to ignore the references to the difficulty finding mental health care and the limited resources. Fourteen years ago we were told by the state those services would be paid for in full, no references to limited funds and providers.