Satanic-Free Homeschooling

posted in: Apollo, Homeschooling, Humor, Large Family | 14

Little Earthling Homeschool offering satanic-free homeschooling since 2000.

Traveling in the van recently, the topic turned to Ouija Boards came up. I have no idea how or why. Apollo sat in his car seat keenly listening, as he always does. He doesn’t miss much. 

You shouldn’t play with those, ever. The Bible says we should avoid things like that.” I said to the van full of kids in general.

 There was brief pause and then Apollo said, “Well that’s scary!

“Why is it scary?” I asked.

“Because we use those at school.” 

Thankfully, I have over fifteen years of homeschooling under my belt. And I’m used to parenting where nothing is as it seems. 

“Do you mean you use GeoBoards at school?”

“Yes, we use them a lot.”

Don’t worry, I assured him that GeoBoards are just fine. We own several ourselves. In fact, I wrote a post about teaching geometry to preschoolers using those very GeoBoards. No witchcraft involved.

Little Earthling Homeschool: Offering satanic-free homeschooling since 2001. 

What’s the funniest thing your kid has said lately?

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14 Responses

  1. Katie Taylor

    My 5 year old son is named Micah. He watched a bible DVD about the prophets in the old testament and now is sure that he is a prophet because his name is in the bible. 🙂 He also heard me joke I have leprosy (my skin was peeling) and told his Sunday school teacher she had leprosy, her skin would fall off, he would fix it, but she “died and heaven is over by the chairs. ” 5 and 6 year olds are hilarious!

  2. Christina

    My older twin from school has learned the lyrics to uptown funk add in a speech issues and well we get a lot of looks when she starts singing.

    • bakersdozenandapolloxiv

      Oops. The word “dump truck” has caused more than an few issues in our house.

      • Kara Wyandt

        It was fire truck for us.

      • Dump truck was also an issue for us!

        As for mixed up faith/church issues (mostly):

        The funniest I overheard recently was while driving by a cemetery. The 4.5 year old said to the 3.5 year old, “That’s not a playground, that’s where people go to die!”

        A couple of years ago, my then 2 year old randomly started running through the house yelling, “Run! Run! The Phillistines are coming!”

        About a year ago in the car, the younger was screaming and the older (3 year old) responded, “NO! NO! [Our pastor] is listening!”

        A few months ago, while listening to “The B-I-B-L-E” in the car, 4.5 year old said, “Daddy, that spells Bible. Mom told me that….I thought it spelled ‘Sandwich.'”

    • smuckers jam here. Had to apologize to my teenage brothers when we finally figured out what our daughter was saying. I had blamed them for using bad language around her

  3. Bu-bu-but the Ouija board game is just a game. So I always thought on the many occasions, mostly happy, that I played it as a teenager. And I didn’t grow up to be a degenerate–in fact, married a Catholic (seems to me he played that game in his adolescence too) and we have lived happily ever after.

    Banning the ole Ouija board? That’d be like banning Harry Potter. And I don’t think you do that?!!!??

    • bakersdozenandapolloxiv

      It’s a moot issue. My kids have never seen a Ouija board and no one is interested in Harry Potter. Judah has read the books, but no-one else.

  4. Last week during dinner my two year old shouted at everyone to stop talking. When all the attention was on him he blurted out ‘chickens poo eggs’. Obviously everyone had a good laugh. The funny thing is that it has never been a topic of conversation in our house. Where he got that information from I’ll never know! ☺

  5. nancy from mass

    my 16yo came downstairs the other day and asked “if you were a cop and had to arrest a man with one arm, how would you handcuff him?” (confused look from me.) “would you handcuff him to his ankle?” (still confused look from me.) “what if he was cuffed to his ankle and got away?” me: “first off, cuffing a one armed man to his ankle would be cruel. second, if you cuffed him to his ankle and he got away, you are a bad cop.” He laughed, said “true, true” and walked away.

    these are the kinds of questions he asks me on a consistent basis. Questions I would never know the answer to. (by the way, I googled it and google says to cuff him to his belt loops). Now i know!

    He is not going to college (he is a junior) but is considering the Army (then special forces) or law enforcement.

  6. This happened several years ago when our oldest was about 11yrs. old. We were driving in downtown Seattle and saw a man in a white robe holding a sign. As we drove by him our daughter read….’The End is Near.’ and as we passed him, she turned and misread the other side of his sign as….’Repeat your sins.’
    We’ve had a good laugh about that for awhile.

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